Possibly One of the Greatest Roger Ebert Reviews Ever: TRANSFORMERS 2 (one star)

"Scathing" barely describes it.

Keep in mind that Ebert, contrary to popular belief, is a fanboy's fanboy.  He's listed Evil Dead 2 as one of his top three favorite movies ever... so, I think the case here is that he was looking forward to watching a good Transformers sequel... but what he got was 2 hours of geek "rage fuel".

http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20090623/REVIEWS/906239997

I was one of (seemingly, unbelievably few) that hated the first one.

This doesn't surprise me.

God dammit.  Here I was hoping that they'd try to make an actual movie this time and not a silly special effects extravaganza with inexplicably wisecracking quasiheroes.

I guess Michael Bay does what he does.  People will still lap it up like a dog eats its own vomit.

Thanks for posting this. I got a good laugh.

""Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" is a horrible experience of unbearable length, briefly punctuated by three or four amusing moments. One of these involves a dog-like robot humping the leg of the heroine. Such are the meager joys. If you want to save yourself the ticket price, go into the kitchen, cue up a male choir singing the music of hell, and get a kid to start banging pots and pans together. Then close your eyes and use your imagination."

That is easily the greatest opening paragraph of anything ever written. Evar.

As did I, that was a fantastic read. Still going to see the movie though.

Turbine, I'm with you... I hated the first one so I'm not surprised at all by this news.

I actually like the first one. It's a popcorn movie. Idk. I probably will still see it. GTG.

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Me too. My only expectation for this film is "Be about as decent as the first one."

It's a movie. About giant robots. Based on a 80s cartoon. What are you expecting here?

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I'm expecting Michael Bay to rot in the unrelenting agony of hell for all eternity.